Relationships are like sand held in your hand...

Everyone - or maybe the majority of people know the analogy of relationships being like sand held in your hand. If you pour sand into your hand and squeeze it to no end, no matter what you do it will dwindle away, leaving you with nothing. Much like if you suffocate your partner in a relationship by hounding them about what they are doing, where they are going... slowly you are going to start losing them.

When you pour the sand in your hand and let it sit there, with care it will stay put. When you trust your partner and give them the benefit of the doubt you will find they won't stray away.

I feel so much like I am losing the most important person in my life and it is SO hard keeping my hand open. We were supposed to be together tonight (right now) because all I want is to watch the fireworks. However, he is out and voiced to me he really just wanted to stay out with the guys and whomever. I offered to go down and he said he would meet me somewhere but the anger in his voice made me realize how badly he didn't want to do it. He said, I feel like I can't ever do my own thing. When I finally said, OK I can be understanding. I am just put off because I really looked forward to tonight, but I get that sometimes you just want to do your stuff. His anger lessened, I actually don't feel as anxious as I suspected. Our phone disconnected and it took a while to get it back - but then he said I love you so much and he sounded so genuine. I really hope he has a good time and I am not mad. I realize I have a long way to go to be a good partner and I just hope I haven't screwed up the one relationship I want to truly work. As long as I do everything I think I can do and am the best person I can be though, no one can ask for more. Right now my bf needs space and as much as I have a hard time dealing with it, I have to be supportive and understanding. I am scared, but what good does scared do.

What will happen, will happen. Not a whole lot more to it.